My Powerful Jesus Journey

Secrets, every one's got them. Why though do we have them? Are they (the secrets) embarrassing things? Are they things that make you feel ashamed, inadequate, or like a terrible person? Or maybe your secrets just simply make you feel things that just can't be explained, and you just know they aren't happy feelings? Only you know the answers to these questions, well God too. My real question for you is why do we REALLY have secrets? Obviously you simply just don't want anyone knowing about it but if it's just because of how you feel, well why don't you just own your feelings? After all feelings are just a state of mind. You have the ability to choose how you feel! So why do we allow ourselves to continue to have secrets and allow all of those lousy feelings control you? Is it because you're afraid? Fear comes from Satan so you can just spit on that feeling right now and tell it go away in Jesus' name! What's deeper than the fear; the underlying feel

So this is the first year I fully realize what Good Friday really is. It says in the Bible that we are not to mourn the crucifiction of Jesus, but there is an unexplainable feeling I've had today about all that Jesus endured for us. It's almost uncomprehendable that He would do that just for us, but that's why it was Jesus. He knew and understood it for only He could. But then I move on to having such grateful appreciative joy. Not tears of sorrow but tears of joyfulness! Jesus died for US! He died for OUR sins, OUR iniquities, OUR burdens! He died for it ALL! Now we can simply ASK God for forgiveness , to help us, for everything ! Thank you, Jesus, for your ultimate sacrifice. Thank you, God, for the new covenant. Thank you for everything you have done for us, and always being for us. I love you, God , I love you ! I LOVE YOU! AMEN! Tonight we went to a church that had a special walk through with displays and explanations of Holy Week and Easter. I loved it! I

I don't know what lies ahead. I don't know what I'm to do. During the day I'm  so excited to live my life for Christ! At night I feel so discouraged and frustrated. I'm a stay-at-home mom who can't drive and I go, or feel like I could go, completely crazy! All the crying, defiantness, misbehaving attitudes along with the slew of seamless mess that's left for me to just pick up; I find myself simply unable and too exhausted to do anything but thank God that my kids are safe, sleeping, and ask for rest. Now don't get me wrong, they aren't always that way. We do have memory making moments filled with good times. I've just had a particularly bad, tough day today. So many feelings and thoughts are being experienced on this day. Really hard to get them out since there are a ton. Simply put, feels like a flood.

 Pastor Francis Chan has a sermon entitled, "spiritual warfare or just a bad day?"   This is something that I have often times asked  myself. After watching his sermon, I did realize what I am going through is indeed spiritual warfare. Crosswalk.com also has an article called "7 Signs you are Under Spiritual Attack." I recommend reading it.  I am definitely no stranger to this  because for some reason Satan really does not want me to have a wonderful relationship with God. That is not going to stop me ever! This fight does get hard, it does get quite tough, but this is what we have to fight for: taking authority over Satan in Jesus's name because Satan is not to control us because we belong to Jesus our savior  for he is the one that died on the cross for us!

  Fun fact about me: God speaks to me in my dreams!  So this morning before I got up I had quite the dream. In this dream is a set of twin boys whom I know from when I was younger in school. Now in real life these boys were not very nice to me yet here they are in my dream; sad, wounded, broken...   There was a girl too who I did not know in real life. For her it was the same heartfelt sorrow, that big pit of darkness looming over all of them.  It was like Eeyore and that eternal rain cloud hovering over him wherever he went. The reason why these people were in my home on a farm was because I was doing a news segment on losing your parents in a horrific accident and how to heal and recover from such a loss. Now I have suffered my own loss by losing my dad. I only knew him for nine years but at least he died in peace and happiness in the comfort of his own home. These people in my dream did not have that luxury. The twin boys describe how their parents died in a very bad accident an